January 12, 2012

his first love.

Ladies and Lads,

Twas' the night before Christmas eve and all through the sportsbook...

were a bunch of burly beer-filled men... and me.

I anxiously stood in front of the wooden thing that holds all the different paper bets. Emphasis on ALL.

Parlay, happy hour Friday, teaser, baby pencils, so many bubbles and numbers...ahhh! Which to choose?

I felt I had to be quick. Bulky hands twice the size of mine kept reaching over me. Clearly I was in their way and it was quite bothersome to them. I was puzzled; Do I stay here and fill it out at this little table? I don't think so because I'm getting the look...

Where do I go???

Why didn't I pay more attention all the other times I watched the MVP do this so calmly?? Why oh why!

All I wanted to be was the cute cool girl who was so awesome because she made sports bets.

Wishful thinking.

I was a sweaty palms nervous wreck; I felt like I was in a dream and had no clothes on while the bearded men horribly laughed in slow motion. I was just an annoyance.

I was in an overly sensory environment yet felt totally numb. I wanted to escape but for him, I had to get myself together.

He would be so proud. He would think I was totally awesome. He will be happy.

So I did it. I found the nicest looking non-judmental testosterone pumped human and asked for help.

I was so disappointed. I HAD to ask for help. He was quick and efficient and sent me on my way.

Thank you nice man and I apologize for my twitchiness.

Thank goodness I knew you could only pay with cash. Thank goodness.

I bought my sports bet and bolted out of there.

I tucked that little slip of white glossy paper deep into the MVP's Christmas stocking.

He was proud. He thought I was awesome. He was happy.

The intimidating adventure was well worth it...especially when my bets won.

Guess who proudly picked up the winnings???


So there you have it. There's a glimpse of a girl who was raised with two sisters. Our poor father, who desperately tried to get us to play sports, was busy having tea parties and buying us tampons. I always liked sports and was/is very competitive but could never hold still to really learn the game.

The MVP was raised in a house full of boys. Toy chests were filled with basketballs and baseball card binders. The shelves were loaded with trophies, medals, and team pictures. His mom was busy driving stinky pubescent boys to practice and through drive-thrus on the way home.

And then two became one.

How do you merge? You don't.

I've come to the conclusion that sports was his first love. I can either be jealous and envious of his darling obsession or....obsess with him.

So here's to my efforts of transitioning from liking to loving. PTI, Mike and Mike, Around the Horn, Colin Cowhard (I was just informed it's Colin Cowherd..opps!) out.

You have a new fan in the building.

Cheers to all the sports enthusiasts,




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