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February 5, 2016

Spiritual Badass Prescription number TWO from a divorced single girl ----> BE OKAY ALONE, SISTER!


Alright, folks! 

You know you are single and alone when all your loved ones are sending you shit like this all the time.

It brightens my day so freakin' much. 

Here's the juice, the nitty-gritty, the sweet sweet nectar about being...dun dun dun.....................alone. 

ROCK IT, SISTER!

Here's my short and not-so-sweet lesson for you...YOU NEED to be OKAY alone. 

Yep. I said it and I'm sending it straight to your feeling-sorry-for-yourself-ass.

Are you in a relationship and feel alone? Guess what?! That's on YOU! It ain't your partners job to make YOU feel secure or happy. The best medicine you can do is become a better YOU. You can barely make yourself happy; do you want to be responsible for making someone else happy? The answer is no. Why? Because it's not possible. TRUST ME. What you want is to independently Feel happy and your partner to independently feel happy.

Now now. Sorry (no I'm not!) for being so harsh. 

I can only say this because I used to spend my quiet alone moments in a fetal-position cursing my pain away. 

Being alone meant had to feel and lean IN to my world I DIDN'T want to be in.
Being alone meant I needed to become a big girl.

Makes me cringe! The truth is, I needed those moments. I needed the contrast. 

...and while I'm being honest....gulp....just because I'm happy being alone doesn't mean I never get lonely. I'm human and I long for connection just like the rest of us. 

...and THAT'S OKAY! Cha-ching!

I like to go deep (that's what she said) and my alone moments have served me SOOOOO well. 

With Valentine's Day approaching...all the single ladies and gents get all sad and shit. I can't really state my emotional status for that day but I will say I'm totally NOT scared of it. In fact, my thoughts have been how can I make the MOST and consume myself in ALL the love around me?

I ain't no victim and neither are you!

Why? because my life is over-populated with lovely things. NEWS FLASH! ....yours is, too.

I'm looking forward to letting what ever bubbles up, bubble. (does that make sense?)

Being okay alone has allowed me to practice the art of being whole. I felt as if I was cruelly being forced in to a depressing life, doomed to be old with cats. Little did I know I was being forced to owning my own stinky shit and figuring out who Katie reeeeeeeeally is and what my purpose here on this earth is. 

THAT IS THE JUICE!

My hearts longs to make you laugh, make you think, and bring out your most silly-adventurous-dreaming-vulnerable-talented-loving self. 

You can be VERY lonely even in a world or home filled with people. My loves, honor those feelings. Life doesn't have to be lived that way. The farther you run away and the more you blame someone else for YOUR feelings, the farther away you get from what you want. 

Do you know what you want? 
I can tell you. You want connection, confidence, fun, and wholeness. Who doesn't?

The feelings of being lonely in a relationship or single are just indicators of where you are. That is OKAY to be there, but girlfriend, you DO NOT have to stay there. 

I've said it a million times and I will continue to annoy the shit out of you with it. Work on you. YOU, can only control YOU. 

HEAR ME: the reason you feel so lonely is because you are expecting and relying on someone else and external "things" to satisfy. You aren't looking INWARD or giving yourself the gift of knowing yourself, fully. Your expectations of how your life should look and how your heart should feel are robbing you of what is right in front of you...staring back at you in the mirror.

I urge you to read that again and again and again and again, damn't. 

The more you melt into being okay alone...life suddenly and QUICKLY takes a turn for the BEST. 

Ask yourself if you're REALLY okay being alone. How much time do you spend alone? Are you scared of being alone? Why? What is the deepest core fear of being alone? Are you relying on other people to make you feel not-alone? 

Those are just leading questions. You literally have all the answers inside your heart and that incredible working brain of yours. You don't need my direction on what to do...alone time spent leaning in will give you the freedom you so desire. 

LASTLY....

Cheers to all my fellow single bitches! Let's maintain wholeness and raise the standard for ourselves...and only ourselves. You deserve epic love and my lovely lady, you ARE epic love. 

Choose it. 

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